Tuesday, 21 October 2008

Lyrical Therapy: DAY 3

PEACE & REFLECTION

I’m beyond trying to figure out a way to kill him. My ego was bruised…no need to be pedantic about it. It’s not like I was devastated…close but no cigar. Time to put it behind me like an old episode of The Young and The Restless. One day left in the grieving process.

A hundred days have made me older,
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face,
A thousand lies have made me colder,
And I don’t think I can look at this the same.
[1]

I don’t want to be bitter…and I truly believe that I will be blessed with a soul that’s a thousand times better than the fool who hath been.

Tell me a story,
Where we all change,
And we'd live our lives together,
And not estranged.
I didn't lose my mind it was
Mine to give away,
Couldn't stay to watch me cry,
You didn't have the time,
So I softly slip away...
No regrets they don't work,
No regrets now they only hurt.
Sing me a love song,
Drop me a line,
Suppose it's just a point of view,
But they tell me I'm doing fine.
[2]

I’m no longer Sade’s King of Sorrow. I didn't like him enough and besides, I respect myself too much.

I won't suffer, be broken, get tired, or wasted.
Surrender to nothing, or give up what I,
Started and stopped it, from end to beginning.
A new day is coming, and I am finally free
Run away, run away, I'll attack…Run away, run away, go chase yourself
Run away, run away, now I'll attack
Your promises, they look like lies. Your honesty, like a back that hides a knife,
I promise you)…I promise you…And I am finally free!
[3]

An eerie peace envelopes me….its only eerie because I don’t do peace. I wouldn’t be able to recognise it if it smacked me in the face. I eat an apple, to make sure it’s real and that it lasts the duration of my crunching and munching.

Its a shame in a way cause
I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me,
Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face,
Will my true love ever be?
Why would I go on a search again,
When I know what the end will be,
What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?
…I’m not missing you,
I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and then hoping you’d call me,
I’m not missing you,
You might have had me open
But I must be coping because,
I’ve got lots to do,
I know I'm usually hanging on,
I used to hate to see you gone,
But this time its different.
I don't even feel the distance.
I'm not missing,
I'm not missing you.
[4]

The initial hatred has dissipated. I no longer wish to peel off his skin with a carving knife, rub salt in the wounds and then burn his house down with him strapped inside...

Cool breeze and autumn leaves, Slow motion daylight
A lone pair of watchful eyes, Oversee the living
Feel the presence all around, A tortured soul,
A wound unhealing, No regrets or promises,
The past is gone, But you can still be free,
If time will set you free, Time now to spread your wings ,
To take to flight, The life endeavour,
Aim for the burning sun…
[5]

Some more Chocolate…The Lord Almighty’s way of having mercy on women-kind.

In this farewell, there’s no blood, there’s no alibi
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret from the truth of a thousand lies…..
….Put to past, what you thought of me.
While I clean this slate, with the hands, of uncertainty.
So let mercy come and wash away, what I’ve done
. [6]

I don’t think for a couple of hours…and I didn’t even have to take any drugs…ah bliss.

I’m doin’ just fine,
Getting along very well,
Without you in my life.
I don’t need you in my life.
I’m doin’ just fine,
Time made me stronger,
You’re no longer on my mind.
[7]

And now? On to the next chapter…Back to the Gym for a start.

Heaven help the heart, that lets me inside.
Heaven help the one, who comes in my life.
Heaven help the fool, that walks through my door.
‘Cause I’ve decided right now, I’m ready for love
. [8]

9 comments:

  1. [1] Here Without You - Three Doors Down
    [2] No Regrets - Robbie Williams
    [3] I'll Attack - 30 Seconds to Mars
    [4] I'm Not Missing You - Stacie Orrico
    [5] You Can Still Be Free - Savage Garden
    [6] What I've Done - Linkin Park
    [7] Doing Just Fine - Boyz 2 Men
    [8] Heaven Help - Lenny Kravitz

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  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. you need to get here now

    Chris Daughtry - Over you

    Now that it's all said and done,
    I can't believe you were the one
    To build me up and tear me down,
    Like an old abandoned house.
    What you said when you left
    Just left me cold and out of breath.
    I fell too far, was in way too deep.
    Guess I let you get the best of me.

    Well, I never saw it coming.
    I should've started running
    A long, long time ago.
    And I never thought I'd doubt you,
    I'm better off without you
    More than you, more than you know.
    I'm slowly getting closure.
    I guess it's really over.
    I'm finally getting better.
    And now I'm picking up the pieces.
    I'm spending all of these years
    Putting my heart back together.
    'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
    I got over you.

    You took a hammer to these walls,
    Dragged the memories down the hall,
    Packed your bags and walked away.
    There was nothing I could say.
    And when you slammed the front door shut,
    A lot of others opened up,
    So did my eyes so I could see
    That you never were the best for me.

    Well, I never saw it coming.
    I should've started running
    A long, long time ago.
    And I never thought I'd doubt you,
    I'm better off without you
    More than you, more than you know.
    I'm slowly getting closure.
    I guess it's really over.
    I'm finally getting better.
    And now I'm picking up the pieces.
    I'm spending all of these years
    Putting my heart back together.
    'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
    I got over you.

    Well, I never saw it coming.
    I should've started running
    A long, long time ago.
    And I never thought I'd doubt you,
    I'm better off without you
    More than you, more than you know.

    Well, I never saw it coming.
    I should've started running
    A long, long time ago.
    And I never thought I'd doubt you,
    I'm better off without you
    More than you, more than you know.
    I'm slowly getting closure.
    I guess it's really over.
    I'm finally getting better.
    And now I'm picking up the pieces.
    I'm spending all of these years
    Putting my heart back together.
    Well I'm putting my heart back together,
    'Cause I got over you.
    Well I got over you.
    I got over you.
    'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
    I got over you.

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  4. You sure have a diverse taste in music. Its really funny how winamp shuffle has a way of tugging at heartstrings.

    I know this wasn't the intention but I think these posts were very coolly written.

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  5. Aasia - Don't worry girl...I'm already there...Theres a song by the Corrs called "I never really loved you anyway"...my sentiments exactly :D

    Waseem - I love all kinds of music that speak to me...sometimes its the lyrics...sometimes its just the beat.
    Thanx for the comp - writing for me is a therapy in itself. Its how I express myself :D

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  6. I find writing very cathatric for me too... I express myself better in writitng than in person...not sure if thats something to be proud of :-)

    Anyways, thank you for sharing this with the blogshere...
    Glad you getting through this the right way---one day at a time and the fact that you have great tunes (and yummy choccies and trifle!) to help you along the way, makes much more bearable, methinks.

    Take it easy and I'm a really good listener and I have plenty of experience when it comes to getting my heart trampled on...so drop me a line if you need to chat...

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  7. Music helps a lot. Apart from making you feel like at least someone else understand what u're going thru, it drowns out The Voices. Sometimes The Voices in your mind are scarier than anything another human can do to you. Allah tests only those whom He loves

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  8. Thanks for taking us all along on this journey with you.

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  9. if you want good girl power lyrics, Shania Twain is the woman

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