Tuesday, 19 May 2009

Epic Conversations

DAD: (after graduation ceremony, reading the agenda) What's this "Cum Laude"?
ME: It means "With Honours", she graduated with honours
DAD: Oh is that it!? I thought that they were saying "Clap Louder" and I just saw everyone clapping louder, so I clapped louder too...

Mother: You girls are so boring…why don’t you go out somewhere…meet new people!
Teenage us: Ok, Fatima is having a get together at her place, can we go?
Mother: No.

Uncle: (to 4 year old Zaynub) Come inside the house, it's Magrieb and its getting dark
Zaynub: No Daddy, I want to play outside
Uncle: Come inside please?
Zaynub: No Boss
Uncle: Get in the house NOW!!
Zaynub: Nooooooo...
Uncle: Ok Zaynub, go...go and play outside please
Zaynub: No...
Uncle: PLEASE go and play outside
Zaynub: No!
Uncle: Please, just go and play outside, NOW!
Zaynub: NO, I want to stay inside!

MJ: my toes are smelly today - i think its these leather sandals
ME: pfft. lol. so many anonymous haters.
I dont know what some of these Hater cunts want from us MJ
MJ: jealous
think about it
they spend their time reading our shit
wishing they were like us
they are jealous of our big dicks
ME: LOL maybe... true...But I dont have a big dick :P
MJ: its ok - im sure it'l still grow

Mother:(after one of my embarrassing ordeals) Is there no rock bottom to your seemingly endless bouts of humiliation?
Me: Apparently Not.


  1. hahaha

    how is the progress on the dick front?

  2. only mj

    i think i'm going to start dealing with my boss the way your uncle dealt with zaynab

  3. Hahaha at the post! :P
    And hahahahaha at Tazeen's comment! :P:P

  4. they should bottle u up and sell u as "potion to get through work today" :)

  5. Parents and children the same everywhere in the world.

  6. gotta love that reverse psych :)

  7. hahaha this was funny!! clap louder!!!

    cant really say which one i enjoyed most reading :D

  8. Tazeen - It grows, slowly but surely :D

    WIP - :D

    Bibi-Aisha - That was classic, I witnessed it first hand and laughed for days after that.

    JDee - :)

    Noojie - If I'm gonna be bottled up for that, you have to be bottled up for "cute" :P

    LL - I'm sure they are.

    MJ - Of course :P

    Fatima - Kids are amazing in that they have such huge personalities without even comprehending it.

    T - :P

    Mubi - That was really funny. My Dad is a real nut sometimes :D

  9. the dick story is gold! lolol I should use that.


  10. Saaleha - My mom is waaay cool :D And sometimes my stupidity and humiliation is a great source of entertainment to her :D

    Ms - Yeah it is :D Its still growing :P

  11. Hahaha I like the one with your mom: 'No.' It's almost like a magic word, isn't it? It's short and clear, especially when you're a teen and you want something from your parents. 'Mom, can I...?' 'NO.' And that's that. I sometimes wonder how often I'd use that special word myself if I were a parent. I've got a feeling too many parents want to be friends with their kids and say 'yes' all the time.