I’ll never understand…Seafood.
I’ve always maintained that I don’t eat anything that stays pink AFTER it’s been cooked, but what I really don’t get is how some people can swoon over glorified insects with those tentacles. Prawns, Crab, Lobster, Mussels, Oysters and whatnot, that’s not food in my book, that’s cockroaches and snot.
I’ll never understand…People who French kiss their pets.
It’s disgusting. Period. And if you’re so desperate for unconditional love, have children...1 kid every 5 years is sure to cover your hug and kiss quota. And if you’re really desperate, I’m sure you can pay someone for cuddles. Seriously.
I’ll never understand…Zionism.
Take religion out of the equation and you have Apartheid. It’s as simple as that. And everyone had a fat lot to say about Apartheid with all the riots, worldwide protests and sanctions, so I don’t get why Zionism is the exception. Apartheid and its derivatives were condemned in Germany, South Africa, America and every other nation where the disease of segregation sprung, so why should it be any different now?
I’ll never understand…Peoples obsession with poetry.
Sure there are some out there that are beautiful and moving. But I reckon that the poet is the only person that really knows what the poem is about and hence, the poem can only have significant meaning to the poet. Everyone else’s interpretations are just perceptions…sometimes they’re only ever psychological manifestations of what people WANT to read into…what they WANT to see. It’s kinda like reading your horoscope and taking meaning from those ambiguous and arbitrary predictions.
I’ll never understand…Why Apple never considered making the iPod waterproof.
Enough said. I should patent that.
I’ll never understand…The concepts of Capitalism and Democracy co-existing.
An oxymoron of sorts. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer, and then the rich exploit the poor to get even richer. Then you’re only allowed to give power of authority over your entire existence on earth to one professional Liar who is merely a puppet to the controlling elite. There’s nothing fair about either. Both, in my opinion, are a paradox and we’ve been brainwashed to think we need both to be successful.
I’ll never understand…Why Lays stopped producing their BBQ potato chips in South Africa.
It was my all-time favourite from all the flavours, only recently superceded by the Carribbean Onion & Balsamic Vinegar flavour. Why oh why did they do that?
I’ll never understand…South African spelling rules.
To us, it’s colour, not color and favour, not favor and supercede, not supersede and organise, not organize etc. etc. etc. Why does our spelling have to be different from the rest of the world?
I’ll never understand…People who drink alcohol socially.
Now I’ve always maintained that if I was allowed to drink, straight-up I’d be an alcoholic because I have an addictive personality and sometimes I like to run away from my problems like a coward. However, Islam does not permit alcohol and I’ve been spared the embarrassment of saying things I really want to say but wouldn’t out of social courtesy, as well as the hangovers and rotting liver. As far as I know and from what many a friend has told me, most alcoholic drinks taste like shit and the only perk is that warm fuzzy feeling and a momentary sense of self-confidence before it dissipates either into nothingness or lonely despair followed by a headache the size of Texas and nausea/vomiting spells that can only be rivaled by a dozen oestrogen-fueled pregnant women. So why drink it if you’re not aiming to get hopelessly drunk? Seriously, I want to know. Someone tell me.
I’ll never understand…The wisdom behind horror movies.
I just cannot wrap my mind around why some people enjoy being scared shitless. I take no pleasure out of such activities. If it’s the adrenaline rush people are after, I’m sure there are other things you can do, like jump out of a plane at 35 000 feet with a stranger strapped to your back, hoping and praying that the Parachute works. I guess I’m just not the type to get my kicks from violent slasher movies or those movies delving into the unknown poltergeist territory.
I’ll never understand...People who don’t like chocolate.
I’ve met two or three in my lifetime and I tell them all the same thing; that they have serious problems and should be checked out. I even gave one of the women my doctor’s telephone number. I can understand if people just like it…as in, they don’t need to eat it every day. But to say that you DON’T LIKE chocolate. Dude, there is something wrong with you. It’s unnatural and I’m sure it’s frowned upon in the medical industry.
I’ll never understand…Why men can’t be honest.
See, the thing with animals is that their behavior is somewhat automated. They eat, they shit and they sleep and that’s pretty much it. They don’t cheat on their mating-partners and lie etc. So why can’t men be the same? Why do they always have to deviate from the truth. A couple of years ago, at my discovery or realisation of this phenomenon, I shared my hypothesis with few of my friends…told them that I've discovered that men are natural pathological liars, whether they do so intentionally or not, and they didn’t believe me. Said I was being cynical. But today, as I write this, every single one of them have told me it’s the truth. Every single man, from your father to your husband will lie to you about some or other insignificant thing at some point in time. It’s just the way they are...the way the male species has been genetically programmed to operate. It’s human nature.