Wednesday, 4 August 2010

In The Eye Of The Beholder

I always think that good looking men, unlike women, are the real deal because men don’t have to moisturize or wear make-up or pluck their eyebrows or stand for hours on end drying and styling their hair (although the rise of the metrosexual; men-tapping-into-their-feminine-side; makes them the single largest exception to this rule BUT even if he decides to moisturize, he still doesn’t HAVE to).

So when you see a good looking man, or any man for that matter, you know that what you see is what you get. You know that if you woke up next to him tomorrow morning, he may be a bit ruffled around the edges, but he’ll look exactly the same.

Now with women, it’s an entirely different story innit. There’s the make-up and hair and nails (for some)… and for most it is a schlep and the end product is almost entirely different from the natural woman residing beneath those layers. Like they say, there are no ugly women in the world, only ones without make-up.

So in essence, the man never really knows who he’s going to wake up next to. It’s a gamble. He could strike it lucky and find a ruffled version of the woman he knows… or she could turn out to be some kind of Godzilla with dragon toe-nails and false eyelashes strewn across a base/ concealer/ lipstick stained pillow.

I definitely think that there are different types of women in this regard. Like for example, some women love accessories and can be seen sporting all the latest stuff on their ears, around their necks and wrists etc. They even have a special suitcase for their accessories when they go on holiday and will be seen on the beach and swimming in the ocean with matching earrings, bracelets and necklaces etc.

Now you’re either an accessories chick or you aren’t. Nothing wrong with being one, people are just wired differently and some can do it while others can’t or don’t want to. Similarly, you’re either a make-up chick or you aren’t. And you’re either someone who goes to the hairdresser regularly or you’re not. But no matter which way you look at it, being a woman is hard work and for most, it requires some effort to look decent.

I attended a wedding this past weekend and accompanied my cousin to the hairdresser to take care of her baby while she was getting her hair done. Now this is something she’s done many times. In fact, she goes to the hairdresser at least once a month. In comparison, I must have been to a hairdresser three times in my entire life... mostly because I learned how to do my own hair from an early age and never thought it necessary to go to one, whereas she can’t do it by herself. 

But when it comes to make-up it’s the reverse. She almost never wears make-up and even though I’m not a base-concealer-powder-lip-liner-false-eyelashes-lipstick-wearing gal, I will rarely leave the house without a little eye-liner.

I do wonder sometimes, if I got married, what would I look like to my husband in the morning? Would he also see a Godzilla of sorts with my hair all over the place like cousin IT from The Adams Family? Or will he be blinded to all that and only see the woman he married? 

I’m not too concerned though... because with my skills, I can go from this... this... no time ;D


  1. Coyote Ugly: When the girl you wake up next to is so ugly that you will chew your own arm off (so as not to move your arm and wake her) -- so you can leave quietly.

    She may have been beautiful the night before - but in the soft morning light, she's coyote ugly.

  2. hah hah those first couple paragraphs have come out of my mouth before, snap!

    there are alot more good looking men in this world than good looking women, because of the number of good looking guys who don't use make up and most of the good looking women only look like that thanks to make-up. Sometimes I think it isn't fair because some women know how to use make-up to totally change their faces and look like a different person, and some dumb guys may go for that not knowing what they actually look like (I had an aunt who would wake up every single morning before her husband and put on her make up before he saw her) anyways and then there's females like me who are too lazy to spend more than 5 minutes on hair and make up, and I dont have a clue about how to put on eye shadow properly, I've tried but it doesnt come out nicely.

    But most guys say they dont like alot of make-up, and of course they will see you soon enough without make up.

  3. It is a hard work being a girl so i only mostly wear make up and do my hair on the weeknd,it takes like 2 hours to get my hair straight,i hate having curly hair.

  4. Now that is some serious transformation!

  5. If a thing of beauty is a joy forever, then why do modern obsessions with good looks often end up being a joyless enterprise?

    Give me a natural beauty, sans makeup, sans accessories, anyday. I could care less if she has an iPhone, if she's a hijabi fashionista or whatever. If anything, when the heart and mindset is right, those things become ICING on the cake.

    But is the real "cake," the Muslim version of Gisele Bundchen, Alicia Keys or Brad Pitt? I think quietly, that's what us postcolonial Muslims have made 'beautiful' out to be.

    Maybe we should recapture what is beautiful on our OWN terms.

  6. LL - I admire women who don't need to wear any make up and they still look good! Your daughters are gorgeous too.

    Chantal - I believe that if you don't feel good about yourself, no amount of make-up can cover that. Most women who use excessive make-up suffer from low self-esteem and they "hide" behind the mask. If you're confident and you're comfortable in your own skin, you don't really need it because theres an attractiveness that resonates from within :)

    Nadia - I love my curly hair. The problem I have is that I can't brush this hair without it making me look like Diana Ross, so in order to maintain my curly hair I have to wash it every day. And in winter, thats not always an option so I blow dry it straight. It used to take me an hour and a half to get my hair straight... but I've figured out a way to do it in 30 minutes. I could give you tips if you'd like...

    mezba - LOL. Like I said, I love my curly hair but its not always an option. Takes around 25 - 30 minutes for the "transformation" to occur :)

    alija - I totally agree with you. I do think that there are people who have various definitions of whats beautiful outside of Hollywood & Bollywood's criteria. For example, I find confidence very attractive in both men and women. A confident man who carries himself with confidence (not arrogance) and dignity is ace in my books, regardless of what he looks like.

    At the end of the day though, I think character trumps physical beauty. When someone has great character, people become blind to the way he/she looks.

  7. Azra, YOU don't need make-up to be beautiful.

  8. I make beautiful babies.. nuff said *cough*

  9. Greetings from way too hot New York!

  10. confidence makes a huge difference. but heres the thing.... theres a thin line between confidence and arogance. and the latter, i a Huge turn off.

    personally....ill go for gentlemanly behaviour and quiet confidence anytime.

    that being said. i find damon salvatore bloody amazing:P

    (as for the beautification of women.... i agree with victor hugo..or whichever dead writer came up with this and is currently spinning in his grave at my misquote-
    God made a woman beautiful.
    The devil made her pretty.

    -excuse me whilst i retrieve my satanic hair straightener....

  11. LL - Thanks :)

    Zahera - We know hun, we know ;P

    Elizabeth - Welcome to a freezing Johannesburg. I love love love your site & thanks for visiting mine! :)

    Pserean - Definitely confidence, not arrogance. Quiet confidence indeed. And Damon Salvatore IS bloody amazing ;D