Thursday, 29 September 2011

Coz life happens while we're busy making other plans...

Like a runaway train, life can get away from us and surge out of control. It sneaks up on us. At one moment, we’re all dressed up for the party, relaxed and unworried about taking a little nap. Then suddenly, everything changes: it’s time to go, we arrive late, or we’re locked out… for good! Show’s over.

While observing others and observing events in my own life, I've realised that lives don’t go sour overnight. They may appear to, and the final unravelling may be swift and terrifying, but the process takes time and thousands of tiny decisions, building one upon the other. And often we hardly notice where they’re leading and what they’re adding up to.

As we examine our consciences, we usually find no single matter of great seriousness, no murders, no child abuse, no major hates, no adulteries. And we think we’re home free. But what we really need to look at are the persistent patterns of our daily choices which cumulatively define who we are.

In the Watergate crisis, “Deep Throat” said to “follow the money” if we wanted to find the real culprits. In our lives, there’s a parallel: Follow the persistent patterns of your choices if you want to find out who you really are.

Here’s the bottom line: If you don’t want your life to surge out of control, track the patterns of your daily choices early and often. It's all a part of living consciously. These patterns and choices will tell you who you are and where you’re headed, and they’ll tell you when you have some course corrections to make. The patterns don’t lie, so watch them closely, with The Almighty at your side.

Now, if only I could take my own advice!


  1. Great advice, Azra! You're right, these sorts of changes don't happen overnight, leading a good life and being the best person you can be is a matter of time, dedication, and making the best decisions you can along the way, everyday. Thank you for this small, sweet reminder. :)

  2. Those are wise words indeed.

    When I am out of my hibernating mood, then I may think about my pattern.

  3. Hmm..I think I know what my pattern is..& I know what to change & what not to change

  4. I really need to make an effort to live consciously. Thank you so much for posting this. I believe most of us don't look at our patterns because we don't WANT to see what we're becoming. It's so easy to look at the "case by case" and blame fate rather than accepting responsibility for our choices. Excellent post! Thanks again!

  5. This is so very true. Eat the wrong type of fruit and you're going to get the shits.

  6. YES I think it is all about patterns. And sometimes it's just very small simple things like changing a single habit. Le sigh, it IS very hard though.

  7. Gosh. If I sit and analyse my patterns I'll be more confused than I already am.

  8. I love that you used Deep Throat as an example!

  9. But -- my sins are the most interesting part of me...

  10. Hi there, Azra. I always say, you never know what's going to happen, but SOMETHING unexpected IS going to happen. If that doesn't make me sound like Forrest Gump...

  11. Michi - I'm sure you don't have these problems :D

    Prixie- I've been thinking about my pattern too... it involves a lot of indecision on my part.

    bb-Aisha - My sentiments too...

    Angie - Very true, these days it seems that people are less inclined to take responsibility for their actions and behaviour.

    GB - I'll assume you're talking from experience ;)

    Diedre - Yeah it's very hard, because we're mostly creatures of habit innit *sigh*

    Juliette - It's not so much analysing, as it is just taking note of your reactions etc. It will come with time :)

    Megan - lol ;)

    LL - It's not so much the sins that's up for scrutiny... it's those characteristics or reactions to situations that make our lives more difficult than what they already are... maybe if we did things differently, we'd have better outcomes?

    RCB - I will tell you my favourite line in "The Count of Monte Christo": ‎"Life is a storm my friend. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes. You must look into that storm and shout "Do your worst, for I will do mine!" Then the fates will know you as we know you"... doesn't matter what happens, it's how we deal with it that counts :)

  12. Azra !

    The human mind is capable of rich subtle detail. Some of us can see 100 rooms in our mind and in each of those rooms recall 100 items by name. Some of us, like me, can’t recall 100 items in one room. But no matter how flexible or ridged the mind, the universe is a network of trillions of details and all of them impact everything else. As the expression goes, the devil is in the details. We must all strive as best we may to shepherd the details of our life in order to maximize our happiness and minimize any unraveling of our life’s tapestry. There is usually no single cause when things go wrong. Like you said, its usually a cascade of decisions and events that lead us to where we find ourselves at any given point in life.


  13. Left Coast Guy - That's so true, we should be the shepherds of our lives and the decisions we make :)

  14. hiii ... Nice Post ..

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