I'll tell you a secret. When I'm really stressed out, I like to smoke. It's the only thing that really calms me down. Not cigarettes though, something much worse - Hooka / Sheesha / Hubbly Bubbly - take your pick. And I prefer a specific formula in the mix of flavoured molasses: one third mint, one third bubble gum, and another third substituted with either strawberry or paan flavours.
But I only ever want to light up that pipe on hot summer nights, or when I'm particularly disillusioned with life; which, believe it or not, is not very often. Mostly because I gym regularly and I can't kill my lungs as often as I'd like to.
And while I'm here confessing my sins, let me just say that those chocolate covered sweets / chocolate covered candies... yeah I don't like those. Especially those with the hard, chewy centers... and those that splinter in your mouth as you bite into them, making the sweet / candy centers pierce or cut your tongue. I always secretly eat all the chocolate off, and then discard the rest - which is awfully wasteful.
Also, I find that there are some people with whom you can only ever have the same kind of conversation. Like Fiona, an acquaintance, for example. We have the same conversation every single time we see each other. We'll complain about our respective work loads and bitch and moan about this and that. But the day I have nothing to complain about, or I'm cheerful and grateful, she actually looks put out... like she doesn't know how to respond to that.
And let me not talk about something else... like the weather, or brownies, or Edward Snowden... then she looks at me like I've gone bonkers; like she can't comprehend or relate and can therefore not participate in the conversation... until I start complaining about the workload again... and the look on her face transforms into: Home. Cue enthusiastic and animated dialogue.
"So, where do you see yourself in 5 years?"
Dumbest.question.ever. Uhm, lets see shall we... 5 years ago, I never thought I'd be here. In fact, the life I envisioned for myself 5 years ago is completely different to what it is today. Five years ago, we never anticipated that we'd still be crawling out on our knees from this never ending masked recession. What fascinated me endlessly 5 years ago, bores me shitless today.
So what's the point of such an outdated question... a question that has no place in our contemporary fast-paced politically and economically volatile environments? You want to know if I have ambition? The answer is Yes. Where that ambition will be directed to, The Lord only knows. Because Life happens while we're busy making plans.
And finally, I find that the ever increasing problem with the world, is the disparity between the "do nothings" and the rest of us. The "do nothings" are people like the Kardashians or the latest internet sensation/s who don't live in reality as we know it; people living at home off their family fortunes; selling their lives or lifestyles to increasingly voyeuristic audiences on social media platforms...
THAT versus the majority of people that actually have to live humdrum lives complete with paying rent and student loans and having to answer to bosses, do laundry... people that actually have to shop for necessities like food and detergent and don't have the luxury of living with their rich mummies and daddies; while the Next Big Miss Thing flashes her boobs, paints her toenails and shows you how she does her makeup better than you do.
And at first novelty breeds awe... then envy... and then over time it naturally morphs into something else: resentment... especially when we're being told that having a PhD won't guarantee that we'll have jobs, and that you might as well ditch any idea you have of doing what you "love" because that won't pay the bills, and that this horse will have a better retirement than you will. It's the whole Titanic thing all over again... hundreds of people drowning or freezing to death in this ocean called Life, while an elite handful sit snug in their boats, oblivious to anything that doesn't include Justin Bieber. The worst is that there seems to be little hope for the masses out there.